Keeping it real?

We Blind ourselves to the truth, because we are weak and we hope, but there is no hope for love. Love ends in betrayal, now and always.

Chatting with a friend today, she was horrifically raped, we are not just talking the act in itself, which is bad enough, but so much more, I wont go into details, as I don’t think she would appreciate that, but what she went through, would be enough to drive even the most sane of us, to insanity.

Still she is fighting  to regain her life,or some semblance of who she was and I don’t think I have ever seen a person so destroyed, her resolve puts my tiny battles to shame, I cried and hurt over some girl, that in effect was nothing.

Her battle is so much bigger, her daily struggle so much harder.

She has talked only of this to myself and two other people and I want to explain how amazing this girl is, when she told me, she took my hand, with tears in her eyes and a visible shake, her words were “I need to talk to you, but you have to promise me, you wont get crazy on me, or throw away everything you have done to change yourself, that would mess me up even more, and I need you now as my friend, f@ck I need something, I can not do this on my own….you have to promise me “D”….please just be my friend, don’t go nuts on me…..promise me”

At the time I just thought may be her puppy had died or something dumb like that…. Ok I am a guy….Not really known for being sensitive…!

But as she sat and talked, the story unfolded, I realised how wrong I was and in those moments I don’t think I have ever been so angry, I wanted to hunt this guy down, by the time I had finished not even his own mother would recognise him….yet I had made her a promise and despite my own crazy head, I couldn’t throw away that trust, or the promise I made. I let Carla-Janye down, she cut upwards in her arms and caught the next bus out of here, I wont make that mistake again.

So after a smoke, I put my arms around her and made good my promise all the time wishing I could save her from the world, take away the pain and see my friend smile, take this away from her….but I can’t and I can’t end her suffering or the damage done, I can’t even make it right….I can only do what she asked….be her friend, be there when it matters.

“Love ends in betrayal now and always, but close friends bond with blood always and forever”

I honestly don’t know how I can help her, but I am glad she felt able to talk to me, and I will do what ever I can, because this stuff matters…..and her strength amazes me!

~ by Duma Key on July 5, 2016.

2 Responses to “Keeping it real?”

  1. Listening and being there was probably the best thing you could have given her…I am glad you were there for her …I have always felt you were a good friend to others…hugs

  2. You are helping your friend Duma, more than you know, and as Summer has already said. By just being there listening, being her friend and supporting her means a whole lot.
    Life can be a excuse my words a ‘Bitch’ in more ways than one. But having your trust is the best thing you can offer your friend at times like these.
    And I know you will continue to bring her that support ..
    Big Hugs your way for who you are BEcoming.

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